Start with your russet potatoes. Peel them and cut them into crinkle shapes. If you don’t have a crinkle cutter, you can opt for traditional fries, but crinkle adds character. Remember to soak them in cold water for at least 30 minutes before frying; this helps remove excess starch and makes for crispier fries.

In a large, heavy pot or a deep fryer, pour in the peanut oil and heat it to around 350°F (175°C). Use a thermometer to monitor the temperature. Too hot, and your fries will burn; too cool, and they’ll become soggy. While the oil is heating, we can move on to the cheese sauce.

In a separate saucepan, heat the canola oil over medium heat. Sauté the chopped onion and diced jalapeño until they start to soften, about 3-4 minutes. Toss in the black peppercorns and sea salt—let those flavors mingle! Pour in the rich cream and bring it to a gentle simmer.

Once the cream starts to bubble, add the Velveeta and cheddar cheese, whisking constantly until fully melted and combined. Toss in the smoked paprika and champagne vinegar. Simmer for about 10 minutes until the sauce thickens slightly. If it gets too thick, don't worry; a splash of cream can bring it back to life.

By this time, your oil should be hot. Carefully add a handful of the crinkle-cut fries into the oil, ensuring you don’t overcrowd the pot. Fry them for about 5-6 minutes or until they achieve a beautiful golden brown. Remove them using a slotted spoon and place them on a paper towel-lined plate to drain excess oil. Sprinkle with sea salt and garlic powder while they're still hot.

Now comes the best part—assembly! Place a generous serving of fries in a bowl or on a platter. Drizzle that gorgeous cheese sauce all over. Feel free to go wild! If you’re feeling adventurous, throw some extra diced jalapeños on top for that added kick. Serve immediately and watch them disappear!